Sooooooooo... Yes. We are still doing this. Those first 4-5 days were great. Saw improvements and was impressed with how it was working. Then, I got lazy. Wasn't on top of things as much as I was the first week. We also went to my parents house and the boys decided that since we were not home they could go back to normal and not listen to me. Probably didn't help that I was not with them all the time because I had to work and we had a baby shower to go to. I will say that they did behave better then I would have thought they would with all the different things they had to endure. LOL
They still had time outs for not listening when we were at the house. That was fun since the air was broke and it was so hot. They would scream and cry and get overheated. I was hot and just wanted them to stop so that made my patience disappear faster. At one point I threw them both in different rooms that had fans blowing on them so they could cool down. Then let them back out when they were ready to keep their noses on the wall.
Also learned that it works better without help from other people. Including the husband. I just get more irritated when someone is trying to help or not doing it the right way. Or maybe it was just the heat. Probably both HAHA.
So since we have been home I again haven't been doing it as well as I could and should be. Today for example has been more "If you do not get in your room/ If you do not get out of the kitchen etc...You will be putting your nose on the wall." This works, they run to where they are supposed to be. But I have to repeat myself more then I'd like and that is usually the threat rather then just having them do it for doing what they shouldn't be doing. I guess I'm trying to avoid the screaming and crying?
Which brings me to the screaming and crying. I would love to know how to stop this!! 95% of the time JD has to go in time out he says "NO!" which turns into screaming it and crying and then when he is in time out he wont stand up and screams in my face. I have tried the surprise approach of a little pop on the mouth or getting inches from his face and telling him that is not acceptable behavior/not how you talk to mommy. But it doesn't work. Eventually he says "if you stop saying it (stand up) I will" which isn't how it should be. He should do as I tell him not make a "compromise?" of sorts. I don't know. We will have to work on this more. JAE does it to sometimes and I'm thinking he is just copying JD. Oh goodie.
Showing posts with label Tomato Training. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tomato Training. Show all posts
Friday, August 06, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Tomato Training
No, not that kind of tomato training..this has nothing to do with gardening. :) Although, there is alot of seed planting, growing and pruning involved. I'm tomato training the boys, training them to listen, behave, and become Godly children! To learn and act upon the commandments God has given us (more focus on the first 5 right now).
1. Love God and put Him first
2. Never make fun of God or His name
3. Always tell the truth
4. Never take anything that is not yours (or don't grab things from someone's hand)
5. Always LISTEN to your parents
We will also be focusing on character. Growing and increasing good character traits and eliminating the bad. So far we are working on whining, crying, bossyness, not telling mommy/daddy no, having a positive attitude, sharing, and not fighting.
Where did this idea come from? Its based on the book/website: Raising Godly Tomatoes
I'm going to blog about our adventure to help see how things work and change or to see if it fails. Hoping it doesn't and going into day 4 I have seen a couple positive changes already. I'll blog each days experience, but only post it every 5 days or so as not to overload everyone with posts lol
Day 1: JAE 100% into training. JD ehh..if I think about it
So the morning went well. JAE was listening for the most part and only had a few corrections for obeying what I told him to do. We went to the fair this day so they were behaving very well! Only had one instance where I told JAE to come stand by me instead of 5 feet away and he didn't want to listen. But I kept telling him to come over and after the 4th time he did. After a few hours they got hot and tired and a little cranky but with distraction and little "no, we don't act like that" they made it to the car for nap. That night JAE got bossy with daddy so I told him to say sorry. He right out refused for 15mins. After a time out and a couple spankings he said it. Not with a happy attitude, but we will be working on that.
Day 2: JAE 100%, JD more then the first day
Again we were not home this day. JAE came with me to a family bridal shower and was very well behaved. He usually is a very sweet behaved boy so I wasn't surprised. He listened and stayed by me when I told him too. I did let him wonder around during game time because well..he's 2 and making him sit still for hours on end just doesn't seem fair and is asking for a melt down. He wasn't to happy at one point later in the day when I told him to stay by me. He did listen though, just wasn't happy.
Later that day we had to go to another party and had 2 problem times. 1 he wanted to play in the boat..I didn't want him to because he started climbing on parts he would fall off of. He whined and cried and tried to run around me. Eventually he gave in and stopped trying. Even big brother was telling him not to go on it LOL 2. He threw a rock that almost hit someone. Spanking and time out led to "no!" "yes throw rock" "no time out!" and trying to escape. Right after time out he went and picked up another one and threw it before I could grab his hand. Back into time out. (This with everyone watching him get in trouble and me feeling like a dork/bad mommy for making a big deal out of it). After the 2nd time out he had his lip out walked over to the rocks looked at me, I said no, he walked over the rocks and into the house. Poor baby, didn't get to have his fun. OH, and we also had the same out right refusal to tell someone something. He had to tell grandma "thank you" and refused for 5mins. Those are the hardest to outlast him in. They seem the dumbest thing to force him to agree to, but I know he's just testing me and trying to have control of something.
Day 3: Both boys 100%
Not to bad of a day really. Home for the most part and both of them had a timeout within the first hour. That was fun..it took longer to have them stay in time out, facing the wall and not rolling around. But all other time outs that day they knew what to do. Took some time for them to actually go and do it, but they did. Also, had a few fighting moments between them so I had them sit on their bed and hold hands until they could be nice to each other, say sorry and hug. Later when I heard JAE start the "JD is being mean cry" I said "JD!" and instantly he said "JAE you wanna cuddle me? Come on JAE, I'm sorry, here you go" HAHA oh it was great!
However, we did go to the store and the instant we walked out the door JD seemed to forget EVERYTHING and so he had to stand next to me walking down the stairs and sit by me while we waited for daddy to show up with the car seat instead of run around in the grass. They caught back on and listened better in the store. The only major thing was JAE woke up from a late nap and was extra cranky. He knew he was choosing not to listen and just keep crying so he had to keep his nose on the wall until he could show me a smile. That took awhile but he did it. JD got an attitude after hockey practice so he had to stay in one spot until he could smile and tell me 2 things that were fun during practice. Seemed to work, he lost the attitude.
The best thing about the past few days?? I haven't had to yell once! Stern, a bit louder then normal voice but no yelling. :) Its great. If that's the only thing that works from this whole thing, I'm cool with that. Oh and I didn't even have to get upset during school yesterday! JD was listening better and paying attention more then normal so that's a HUGE plus too. Yay :)
1. Love God and put Him first
2. Never make fun of God or His name
3. Always tell the truth
4. Never take anything that is not yours (or don't grab things from someone's hand)
5. Always LISTEN to your parents
We will also be focusing on character. Growing and increasing good character traits and eliminating the bad. So far we are working on whining, crying, bossyness, not telling mommy/daddy no, having a positive attitude, sharing, and not fighting.
Where did this idea come from? Its based on the book/website: Raising Godly Tomatoes
I'm going to blog about our adventure to help see how things work and change or to see if it fails. Hoping it doesn't and going into day 4 I have seen a couple positive changes already. I'll blog each days experience, but only post it every 5 days or so as not to overload everyone with posts lol
Day 1: JAE 100% into training. JD ehh..if I think about it
So the morning went well. JAE was listening for the most part and only had a few corrections for obeying what I told him to do. We went to the fair this day so they were behaving very well! Only had one instance where I told JAE to come stand by me instead of 5 feet away and he didn't want to listen. But I kept telling him to come over and after the 4th time he did. After a few hours they got hot and tired and a little cranky but with distraction and little "no, we don't act like that" they made it to the car for nap. That night JAE got bossy with daddy so I told him to say sorry. He right out refused for 15mins. After a time out and a couple spankings he said it. Not with a happy attitude, but we will be working on that.
Day 2: JAE 100%, JD more then the first day
Again we were not home this day. JAE came with me to a family bridal shower and was very well behaved. He usually is a very sweet behaved boy so I wasn't surprised. He listened and stayed by me when I told him too. I did let him wonder around during game time because well..he's 2 and making him sit still for hours on end just doesn't seem fair and is asking for a melt down. He wasn't to happy at one point later in the day when I told him to stay by me. He did listen though, just wasn't happy.
Later that day we had to go to another party and had 2 problem times. 1 he wanted to play in the boat..I didn't want him to because he started climbing on parts he would fall off of. He whined and cried and tried to run around me. Eventually he gave in and stopped trying. Even big brother was telling him not to go on it LOL 2. He threw a rock that almost hit someone. Spanking and time out led to "no!" "yes throw rock" "no time out!" and trying to escape. Right after time out he went and picked up another one and threw it before I could grab his hand. Back into time out. (This with everyone watching him get in trouble and me feeling like a dork/bad mommy for making a big deal out of it). After the 2nd time out he had his lip out walked over to the rocks looked at me, I said no, he walked over the rocks and into the house. Poor baby, didn't get to have his fun. OH, and we also had the same out right refusal to tell someone something. He had to tell grandma "thank you" and refused for 5mins. Those are the hardest to outlast him in. They seem the dumbest thing to force him to agree to, but I know he's just testing me and trying to have control of something.
Day 3: Both boys 100%
Not to bad of a day really. Home for the most part and both of them had a timeout within the first hour. That was fun..it took longer to have them stay in time out, facing the wall and not rolling around. But all other time outs that day they knew what to do. Took some time for them to actually go and do it, but they did. Also, had a few fighting moments between them so I had them sit on their bed and hold hands until they could be nice to each other, say sorry and hug. Later when I heard JAE start the "JD is being mean cry" I said "JD!" and instantly he said "JAE you wanna cuddle me? Come on JAE, I'm sorry, here you go" HAHA oh it was great!
However, we did go to the store and the instant we walked out the door JD seemed to forget EVERYTHING and so he had to stand next to me walking down the stairs and sit by me while we waited for daddy to show up with the car seat instead of run around in the grass. They caught back on and listened better in the store. The only major thing was JAE woke up from a late nap and was extra cranky. He knew he was choosing not to listen and just keep crying so he had to keep his nose on the wall until he could show me a smile. That took awhile but he did it. JD got an attitude after hockey practice so he had to stay in one spot until he could smile and tell me 2 things that were fun during practice. Seemed to work, he lost the attitude.
The best thing about the past few days?? I haven't had to yell once! Stern, a bit louder then normal voice but no yelling. :) Its great. If that's the only thing that works from this whole thing, I'm cool with that. Oh and I didn't even have to get upset during school yesterday! JD was listening better and paying attention more then normal so that's a HUGE plus too. Yay :)
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